I am sitting here, after putting the kids to bed trying to get the energy to do yet another part of my essay. The move from a corporate life to that of a student and mother has come at a loss of lots of things, money, career, status……all those things that in my heart I know matter so little but sometimes amidst the struggle feel important. I remember however how blessed I am to be able to change my life and move towards a direction which gives me fulfilment and allows me to help others and it is that which keeps me going through another assignment
Thank you for sharing this with us! I’ve been struggling to recover from a massive burnout these past two years. It has had everything to do with not being able to make or live by my own ‘to do list’ as you say.
Years and years of parenting my parents....feeling responsible and guilty. Raising three (wonderful) kids mostly by myself and trying not to let everything the world around me had to say about me push me off my path. In the end, I didn’t get pushed. I just broke - all by myself and saw no more purpose to my life. Too much had happened and I saw no way to overcome it all.... but thanks to your books, writings and many, many sparks and prompts I’ve slowly pulled myself back up with every word that’s found it’s refuge on my screen or in my journal. I would like to use this opportunity to THANK YOU ❤️ for helping me get through the most difficult journey of my life! You have no idea what an important difference you make to so many of our lives. 🙏
You are doing an amazing job Michele. After all you have been through you turn this into a gratitude comment for me? Thank you, but you have done all the work. These things take the time they take. Keep on writing, and sharing, and the way will be revealed in your words I'm sure Xx
This describes exactly how I feel right now - even down to the parenting parents and 3 kids. Broken, no purpose, no joy. Hoping this space will help me heal too.
Oh Beth I absolutely love this! I've at long last got to a place where I can say this to myself - my long to do list is full of stuff I chose to put there! And I am so over beating myself up about what I don't get done. I'll always be the person who is over optimistic about what I can achieve in a day :) I'm ok with that. I'm not at your levels of production or where I used to be before my cancer treatment but that's ok too. I love what I am doing.
A well timed essay as I sit here in front of my very first short story trying to drag myself through edits and beyond the self doubt. I want to go back to the fun part when the idea was new and the words flowed and it all sounded perfect instead of being here in this place where I'm questioning every word. But also, I am doing it. This thing I never imagined spending time doing. This thing I have the privilege to spend time on, no matter what the outcome.
Great reminder, Beth, thank you. To be grateful to have got this far and for the opportunity to keep going. I’m in the final stages of a part time art degree that has taken me 8 years so far. The work of creating keeps ending up on the ‘to do’ list and I have to remind myself to move it onto the ‘so grateful for this’ list.
“Remember when you wanted everything you have now?” I repeat this to myself often and is what you’ve so eloquently described above. For so many years I dreamed so hard for the life have now and yes it’s still stressful and yes it’s still hard work but it’s all mine! 🤍
My self-induced stress this week has been juggling a new course I recently enrolled in alongside my paid work and other extracurricular activities 🤓
Wandering around stressing about new book contract not being done yet. Eventually remembering that for about 5,000 years this was what I wanted more than almost anything in the world. Your post was brilliant. Thank you.
Such an important perspective to anchor back to! Lots of things felt on the edge of chaos and stressful this week but I kept reminding myself that I GET to do these many pieces because I’ve created a business that does bend and flex around Mothering and my need for multiple creative projects at once. It’s my desire to keep things varied that sometimes gets me into a bit of overwhelm but I would choose it all over and over again. Xx
Feeling this tonight as I prepare for a future print project. One I’ve dreamt of creating for so long. I’m also juggling family life, maternity leave and business plans. And yet, I am doing the thing. And for that I am so thankful. It’s definitely a world of both/and, where all the things coexist 💛
Tracksuits are wonderful. Along with my version of cozy leggings and sweaters. I’m so glad you are living your dream in the clothes (and food) that are supporting you best. Everything in its rightful season, as they say. Congratulations!
I also feel there are so many pressures and 'outside' influences continually pushing us all off our desired, needed, wanted, path. It takes true strength to not only ... shower :) ... but, stay true to ourselves and what we envisioned for lives. Its nice to read here and know we are all not alone in the process...
This is such a great reminder- it’s too often we idealise things, but half the time that leaves us waiting for the final bit to fall into place and it to finally be perfect - without realising the mess is all part of it and maybe where we currently are is actually pretty great.....
Heya Beth, this is so beautiful. I adore your podcast, so I'm happy you do it. I was very touched by what you said -- that doing your podcast involves writing more words than your book manuscript -- and was wondering, do you write the entire script of your podcast, or is it somewhat spontaneous? About how many words is each episode, do you think? Most people I know do there's at least somewhat off the cuff, so I find your process (at least, what you hinted at) both inspiring and somewhat more accessible for me. Thanks for you great work!
Yes, Beth! I'm finding this season of my life quite challenging because of all I'm juggling AND I know I invited all of it in and challenging as it may be I still want all of it. It also helps that studying the MSc, launching my book, running my business, working part-time for my local Mind, and volunteering won't all continue together forever so I know this is a limited time of full-on-ness ;)
Thank you for writing this. I am coming off a loss in our family that completely knocked me off course. I am supposed to be living my dream and tackling my first novel, but I haven’t written a word in over a week. I know I can do it but right now I’m just trying to get back into the story and keep reminding myself: I chose this project, and that includes the bumps in the road. I know I can get back on track, but being accountable only to oneself is really hard some days!
I know that experience and how hard it is and I am sorry that you are in it right now❤️You can only do what you can do which sometimes means nothing and that is absolutely OK. The words will come back. Take care of your heart Xx
I am sitting here, after putting the kids to bed trying to get the energy to do yet another part of my essay. The move from a corporate life to that of a student and mother has come at a loss of lots of things, money, career, status……all those things that in my heart I know matter so little but sometimes amidst the struggle feel important. I remember however how blessed I am to be able to change my life and move towards a direction which gives me fulfilment and allows me to help others and it is that which keeps me going through another assignment
Dear Beth,
Thank you for sharing this with us! I’ve been struggling to recover from a massive burnout these past two years. It has had everything to do with not being able to make or live by my own ‘to do list’ as you say.
Years and years of parenting my parents....feeling responsible and guilty. Raising three (wonderful) kids mostly by myself and trying not to let everything the world around me had to say about me push me off my path. In the end, I didn’t get pushed. I just broke - all by myself and saw no more purpose to my life. Too much had happened and I saw no way to overcome it all.... but thanks to your books, writings and many, many sparks and prompts I’ve slowly pulled myself back up with every word that’s found it’s refuge on my screen or in my journal. I would like to use this opportunity to THANK YOU ❤️ for helping me get through the most difficult journey of my life! You have no idea what an important difference you make to so many of our lives. 🙏
Much love, Michele
You are doing an amazing job Michele. After all you have been through you turn this into a gratitude comment for me? Thank you, but you have done all the work. These things take the time they take. Keep on writing, and sharing, and the way will be revealed in your words I'm sure Xx
❤️🙏
This describes exactly how I feel right now - even down to the parenting parents and 3 kids. Broken, no purpose, no joy. Hoping this space will help me heal too.
Wishing you the very best Emma ❤️
Yes, Beth! 🙌
Oh Beth I absolutely love this! I've at long last got to a place where I can say this to myself - my long to do list is full of stuff I chose to put there! And I am so over beating myself up about what I don't get done. I'll always be the person who is over optimistic about what I can achieve in a day :) I'm ok with that. I'm not at your levels of production or where I used to be before my cancer treatment but that's ok too. I love what I am doing.
Here’s to being ok to that❤️ And to knowing that whatever we can do is enough
A well timed essay as I sit here in front of my very first short story trying to drag myself through edits and beyond the self doubt. I want to go back to the fun part when the idea was new and the words flowed and it all sounded perfect instead of being here in this place where I'm questioning every word. But also, I am doing it. This thing I never imagined spending time doing. This thing I have the privilege to spend time on, no matter what the outcome.
Nearly there!
Great reminder, Beth, thank you. To be grateful to have got this far and for the opportunity to keep going. I’m in the final stages of a part time art degree that has taken me 8 years so far. The work of creating keeps ending up on the ‘to do’ list and I have to remind myself to move it onto the ‘so grateful for this’ list.
Wow that is some commitment, but what a joy too. Keep going!
Thanks. Just one more year!
“Remember when you wanted everything you have now?” I repeat this to myself often and is what you’ve so eloquently described above. For so many years I dreamed so hard for the life have now and yes it’s still stressful and yes it’s still hard work but it’s all mine! 🤍
My self-induced stress this week has been juggling a new course I recently enrolled in alongside my paid work and other extracurricular activities 🤓
Yes to this! Also hurrah for learning as we go❤️
Wandering around stressing about new book contract not being done yet. Eventually remembering that for about 5,000 years this was what I wanted more than almost anything in the world. Your post was brilliant. Thank you.
That’s exactly it right there! Good luck with the book✨
❤️
Such an important perspective to anchor back to! Lots of things felt on the edge of chaos and stressful this week but I kept reminding myself that I GET to do these many pieces because I’ve created a business that does bend and flex around Mothering and my need for multiple creative projects at once. It’s my desire to keep things varied that sometimes gets me into a bit of overwhelm but I would choose it all over and over again. Xx
And that’s the question to keep asking ourselves I guess, and if the answer is yes I’d do it again then 👌
Feeling this tonight as I prepare for a future print project. One I’ve dreamt of creating for so long. I’m also juggling family life, maternity leave and business plans. And yet, I am doing the thing. And for that I am so thankful. It’s definitely a world of both/and, where all the things coexist 💛
Hurrah to doing the thing in amongst all the things❤️
Tracksuits are wonderful. Along with my version of cozy leggings and sweaters. I’m so glad you are living your dream in the clothes (and food) that are supporting you best. Everything in its rightful season, as they say. Congratulations!
Well quite 😘
Thank you for writing this.
I also feel there are so many pressures and 'outside' influences continually pushing us all off our desired, needed, wanted, path. It takes true strength to not only ... shower :) ... but, stay true to ourselves and what we envisioned for lives. Its nice to read here and know we are all not alone in the process...
Thank you again..
This is such a great reminder- it’s too often we idealise things, but half the time that leaves us waiting for the final bit to fall into place and it to finally be perfect - without realising the mess is all part of it and maybe where we currently are is actually pretty great.....
Heya Beth, this is so beautiful. I adore your podcast, so I'm happy you do it. I was very touched by what you said -- that doing your podcast involves writing more words than your book manuscript -- and was wondering, do you write the entire script of your podcast, or is it somewhat spontaneous? About how many words is each episode, do you think? Most people I know do there's at least somewhat off the cuff, so I find your process (at least, what you hinted at) both inspiring and somewhat more accessible for me. Thanks for you great work!
Yes, Beth! I'm finding this season of my life quite challenging because of all I'm juggling AND I know I invited all of it in and challenging as it may be I still want all of it. It also helps that studying the MSc, launching my book, running my business, working part-time for my local Mind, and volunteering won't all continue together forever so I know this is a limited time of full-on-ness ;)
A season for everything ❤️
Thank you for writing this. I am coming off a loss in our family that completely knocked me off course. I am supposed to be living my dream and tackling my first novel, but I haven’t written a word in over a week. I know I can do it but right now I’m just trying to get back into the story and keep reminding myself: I chose this project, and that includes the bumps in the road. I know I can get back on track, but being accountable only to oneself is really hard some days!
I know that experience and how hard it is and I am sorry that you are in it right now❤️You can only do what you can do which sometimes means nothing and that is absolutely OK. The words will come back. Take care of your heart Xx