I'm unraveling and have been so hard on myself for not feeling like myself and upholding those familiar (and very high) standards you speak of. I feel a weight of letting so many others down... So this message was a sweet reminder. As I unravel I know I cannot be who I was and who other's have grown accustomed to. They have a right to grieve and I have a right to be. xo
Radical Self Care. I applaud you and thankyou for such bad deep sharing. It's been an eye opener, so that I'm looking at my own tortoise slow writing week with fresh eyes, a week of ah has, but little writing; Your article is a big realisation. No wonder my writing's slowed to a trickle. Listening with a deeper compassion now.
Sometimes you just discover gems. Today I discovered this. I lost both my parents within five weeks of one another. I was overwhelmed with the expressions of sympathy, touched by so many heartfelt gestures, blanketed by kindnesses during that time of becoming unmoored. I promised I would write to every one. I promised they would each learn how much their thoughtfulness meant to me. I couldn't finish. Grief seemed to demand every spare particle of my attention and my energy. I never finished saying thank you. Today, five years later, this beautiful essay gave me permission to let it go. Thank you.
Why archive and not trash? Does it mean you’ll go back to it someday? I’ve been putting things in trash, if you know what I mean. This makes me wonder if I should reconsider. 😊
Truly beautiful. First, I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. So many special people to me (IRL and also online) lost parents this year. The shift is so seismic and deep. These words are so wise and comforting, and I hope they reach the masses. This, especially, feels vital.
"I have given so much of my life’s attention to the clutter of our noisy world, when so often I would have been better served focusing on only that which can be illuminated by a single candle in front of me. I am sure I’m not the only one."
We are all so consumed with noise, and perhaps this can be a year we narrow our vision on the simple and vital.
Your words helped me to forgive myself for the fact I have stalled over the last three months, due to outside circumstances, running out of steam, previous overwork and side lined by other commitments. I'm so sorry for your loss but also feel joy that you knew such a special relationship clearly with your mother. What a wonderful mother she must have been. I had no relationship with my own and I grieve for what never was. I know your memories will help nurture you and thank you so much for all your writings given so generously to people like myself who need them and your inspiration and teaching so much.
I found spoon theory - some days I don’t have enough spoons and on those days I retreat. But I also found a beautiful image of grief - at first it fills the whole of us but gradually as we continue to grow it occupies a smaller space. The grief remains the same. In my experience this is true. Sending love for this most difficult Christmas ❤️
Thank you.The more of us who walk the talk on true self care as opposed to commodified wellness,the more we model it as a possibility for others. Sharon Blackie and Katherine May are worth following .
Thank you for sharing ❤️ A kind friend sent me the link to your winter writing course (which I’ve signed up for)
As I read through your post I felt like I was meant to find you! I lost my Dad to cancer 13 years ago and his favourite Carol was indeed “In The Bleak Midwinter” so I shall most certainly be listening to that.
Again thank you 🙏🏻 and sending you love and strength xx
Thank you for pointing me to this last week. My Dad passed on Sunday. Over the short span of his illness, I stopped worrying about deadlines - internal and external. Stuff will get done, at my pace. It's a lesson I've learned when experiencing POTS flairs, it's simply not possible to keep it up and I have to focus on what's important - calming in the face of POTS, grieving and holding the rest of my family close in the case of Dad. I look forward to Korkoro. The scale of this Christmas.will be different. Every future Christmas will be, but especially this one. For now, I'll focus on supporting my Mom and brothers and supporting myself. It's not easy. Dad had a huge work ethic and instilled it in all of us. But for now I'll spend time remembering his goofy side and his live for us.
I have increasingly begun to withdraw from the clutter and chaos of our "modern life". I feel overwhelmed by it all and for me the healing road was somewhere back in a simpler place and time, more connected to myself good souls and nature. My job is in a toxic environment and my intuition has led me to a new path and a huge change and challenge in the new year. They will take me to a place that feels so much better and nurturing, good for my spirit. So this essay has resonated so very strongly. Thank You 🙏
It feels so freeing in this crazy busy and mind boggling world to move at a pace that feels good for my body. To slowly walk down the city street as people push past me. To not force anything that needs to be done, but to always prioritize the things that matter most to me. Somehow, the rest has worked itself out, because an aligned heart and body will move mountains in the most gentle way.
I'm unraveling and have been so hard on myself for not feeling like myself and upholding those familiar (and very high) standards you speak of. I feel a weight of letting so many others down... So this message was a sweet reminder. As I unravel I know I cannot be who I was and who other's have grown accustomed to. They have a right to grieve and I have a right to be. xo
So very beautiful. Thankyou, and my condolences.
Radical Self Care. I applaud you and thankyou for such bad deep sharing. It's been an eye opener, so that I'm looking at my own tortoise slow writing week with fresh eyes, a week of ah has, but little writing; Your article is a big realisation. No wonder my writing's slowed to a trickle. Listening with a deeper compassion now.
Sometimes you just discover gems. Today I discovered this. I lost both my parents within five weeks of one another. I was overwhelmed with the expressions of sympathy, touched by so many heartfelt gestures, blanketed by kindnesses during that time of becoming unmoored. I promised I would write to every one. I promised they would each learn how much their thoughtfulness meant to me. I couldn't finish. Grief seemed to demand every spare particle of my attention and my energy. I never finished saying thank you. Today, five years later, this beautiful essay gave me permission to let it go. Thank you.
Why archive and not trash? Does it mean you’ll go back to it someday? I’ve been putting things in trash, if you know what I mean. This makes me wonder if I should reconsider. 😊
Truly beautiful. First, I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. So many special people to me (IRL and also online) lost parents this year. The shift is so seismic and deep. These words are so wise and comforting, and I hope they reach the masses. This, especially, feels vital.
"I have given so much of my life’s attention to the clutter of our noisy world, when so often I would have been better served focusing on only that which can be illuminated by a single candle in front of me. I am sure I’m not the only one."
We are all so consumed with noise, and perhaps this can be a year we narrow our vision on the simple and vital.
Your words helped me to forgive myself for the fact I have stalled over the last three months, due to outside circumstances, running out of steam, previous overwork and side lined by other commitments. I'm so sorry for your loss but also feel joy that you knew such a special relationship clearly with your mother. What a wonderful mother she must have been. I had no relationship with my own and I grieve for what never was. I know your memories will help nurture you and thank you so much for all your writings given so generously to people like myself who need them and your inspiration and teaching so much.
Thank you for the idea of “The Folder of All That Shall Remain Un-done.” This is self-care. Creating one today!
Beautiful! Thank you.
And your archive folder sounds like my “Haven’t a clue” folder 😀
What a title. And what writing 🤍
I found spoon theory - some days I don’t have enough spoons and on those days I retreat. But I also found a beautiful image of grief - at first it fills the whole of us but gradually as we continue to grow it occupies a smaller space. The grief remains the same. In my experience this is true. Sending love for this most difficult Christmas ❤️
Thank you.The more of us who walk the talk on true self care as opposed to commodified wellness,the more we model it as a possibility for others. Sharon Blackie and Katherine May are worth following .
Thank you for sharing ❤️ A kind friend sent me the link to your winter writing course (which I’ve signed up for)
As I read through your post I felt like I was meant to find you! I lost my Dad to cancer 13 years ago and his favourite Carol was indeed “In The Bleak Midwinter” so I shall most certainly be listening to that.
Again thank you 🙏🏻 and sending you love and strength xx
Thank you for pointing me to this last week. My Dad passed on Sunday. Over the short span of his illness, I stopped worrying about deadlines - internal and external. Stuff will get done, at my pace. It's a lesson I've learned when experiencing POTS flairs, it's simply not possible to keep it up and I have to focus on what's important - calming in the face of POTS, grieving and holding the rest of my family close in the case of Dad. I look forward to Korkoro. The scale of this Christmas.will be different. Every future Christmas will be, but especially this one. For now, I'll focus on supporting my Mom and brothers and supporting myself. It's not easy. Dad had a huge work ethic and instilled it in all of us. But for now I'll spend time remembering his goofy side and his live for us.
I have increasingly begun to withdraw from the clutter and chaos of our "modern life". I feel overwhelmed by it all and for me the healing road was somewhere back in a simpler place and time, more connected to myself good souls and nature. My job is in a toxic environment and my intuition has led me to a new path and a huge change and challenge in the new year. They will take me to a place that feels so much better and nurturing, good for my spirit. So this essay has resonated so very strongly. Thank You 🙏
My radical self care: paying attention to my senses, how they inform me of the world, and how I am guided by them.
It feels so freeing in this crazy busy and mind boggling world to move at a pace that feels good for my body. To slowly walk down the city street as people push past me. To not force anything that needs to be done, but to always prioritize the things that matter most to me. Somehow, the rest has worked itself out, because an aligned heart and body will move mountains in the most gentle way.